As much as I love being with Thea 24/7 I knew I would have to go back to work. I honestly felt devastated, I was so emotional and every time I thought about work whilst on maternity leave I would feel myself choking up. There is nothing wrong with my job, I really enjoy it and my boss and colleagues are super lovely. it was just the thought of not being with Thea.
If we could have afforded me to be a stay at home mum I would have jumped to the idea.
But unfortunately we just wouldn’t be able to afford it. I remember sorting out my keeping in touch days with my boss and going into work to discuss it. I was really excited and nervous about going back and while I was there I was fine, but it was just the thought of one thing ending and another beginning. I was loving being with Thea and seeing friends and family and going to the baby classes and knowing this was going to end because of me going to work felt heart breaking.
I had enrolled Thea into nursery at the end of December to get her use to going. I didn’t want the added stress of being at work and Thea having a meltdown at nursery. Thea is a very clingy baby so I knew it would be difficult for her. Since December Thea has come on leaps and bounds at nursery. She loves being there and the nursery staff are super lovely and keep me up to date with photos and tells me all about her day and log it in a book.
The first few weeks of work were really hard for me. I decided to work Wednesday, Thursday and Fridays. I just wanted to get it all out the way in one go. My gran has her on one day, nursery the next and my parents have her too. Thea is becoming so independent now and she loves just walking around doing her own little thing.
I still feel some mum guilt but at least I know that Thea is well looked after and I am earning some money so we can do lovely things together.Much Love